Someone once said that a visit to the cemetery and hospital can teach a person good lessons in humility as well as humanity.
I just did that over a space of one week – first to pay my respects to my late father, grandfather and ancestors during the recent Ching Ming festival or popularly known as the Chinese “Tomb Festival”.
I was just talking to a friend about my encounters of the close kind at the Sarawak General Hospital when he shared with me his own encounters during the Tomb Festival.
According to this learned friend, “Ching Ming” actually means “Pure Brightness” in English – that may explain why family members and visitors to the Chinese cemetery are armed with brooms, brushes and cleaning utensils, to give their ancestors’ tombs a proper spring cleaning to bring back the gloss and shine and hopefully, the same to their own lives as well.
Of late, this spring cleaning of tombs has since been outsourced to the “professional tomb cleaners”.
Chinese, like followers of other faiths, believe that what goes around comes around – the roundness of most Chinese tombs is probably a timely reminder to visitors of this saying and belief.
My friend told me that he had to remind his children to be extra cautious and vigilant in observing the rituals when paying respects to their elders and ancestors.
The rule is to follow what the elders and more knowledgeable ones among the family members do.
It pays to be observant too, to avoid any inconveniences or embarrassment.
Top of the list is seniority. The oldest ancestors get to be visited first. This is strictly observed as a sign of respect and filial piety.
There are unverified stories of ancestors visiting those who choose to ignore this protocol, something which busy people like us don’t really look forward to.
Showing respect to elders is a good practice as it also cascades to our daily life, at home and at work where respect for seniors is inculcated in us at a very early age.
It also helps with our promotion at work if we do it with courtesy and productivity.
My mother also taught me about reincarnation and karma, something which I initially struggled to comprehend during my early life as my Christian faith and her Taoist, and later Buddhist beliefs seem to be in conflict as in “similar but not the same” philosophy.
But not anymore.
We get along equally well as I believe my mother just wants me to be a good person as my Saviour does, although we may be using different modes of transportation to reach the same destination in the afterlife.
Back to my friend and his close encounters during “Ching Ming”. He narrated how he repelled a bee when it came too close for comfort to him while he was paying his respects at one of his ancestors’ tomb.
He fell sick for a few days after that and attributed it to “showing disrespect” to his ancestors at that material time.
I guess his ancestors must be extremely hardworking to return as a bee as I try to recall what my mother shared about reincarnation.
Visiting cemeteries is indeed a grave business – there’s much to learn about mutual respect, filial piety, protocol, rituals, etiquettes and what-not.
And what about hospitals?
Every month, I bring my mother for her medical check-up at the Sarawak General Hospital.
My eldest brother would wheel her to the specialist clinic for her blood test while I look for a precious parking space some distance down the road.
There’s not a day when the parking lot at the Sarawak General Hospital is not filled to the brim and it’s usually a case of the early bird catching the worm to find one.
As I walked along the corridor to meet up with my mother and brother, I could see lines of people thronging every available space, waiting patiently for their turns to be attended to.
The staff of the Sarawak General Hospital deserve special mention for their dedication and seemingly boundless energy attending to the unending needs of those present – from the simple to the complicated cases.
It is so easy to let loose one’s steam under such trying conditions – most of the doctors here are reportedly working more than 10 hours at a stretch, so I was told – not as glamorous as the television series “E.R.” may have wanted to portray.
Nobody likes to be sick and those of us who spend more time meeting friends at kopitiams than hospitals should count our blessings to be among the lucky crowd, especially if you were 60 years old and above as many much younger ones are regularly seen at hospitals for their medical appointments.
It’s an encounter of the close kind which nobody wishes for though life and fate make decisions which cannot be explained.
Health is indeed wealth and while wealth may give us better healthcare, prevention is still better than cure for most cases concerning health.
We do not know what we miss until we lose it and this saying applies very aptly to our health as age slowly catches up with us.
Take care, do enjoy your life but endeavour to stay safe and healthy always.
Regards for a good weekend.
The views expressed are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the New Sarawak Tribune.
