“Your skirt is too short! Your pants are too tight! Your shirt is too low! You are revealing too much! And so on.”
These kinds of statements and criticisms, which centre on the supposed “revealing” nature of people’s (particularly women’s) attire, have become all too prevalent in this day and age.
Now and then, there will always be someone publicly voicing out their so-called distaste for those wearing attire that they perceive as sexy and too revealing.
Personally, however, I feel that many of these statements are superficial complaints that contribute little to meaningful dialogues or progress, or lessen the hardship of life.
The latest example came from Kuantan MP Wan Razali Wan Nor of Perikatan Nasional (PN).
While debating on the Health White Paper in the Dewan Rakyat, he told the August House that “the nurses’ uniforms are too tight”.
I am not saying that the lawmaker is wrong or otherwise. It’s just that some Malaysians, Wan Razali included, appear to be overly preoccupied with debating and finding fault with others, particularly women who, in their opinion, wear “sexy” attire.
The prevailing notion in this kind of debate is that those who wear “revealing” or “sexy” attire are somehow at fault for attracting unwanted attention or even inviting harassment.
Such a notion is not only unfair but also a misguided perspective that must be challenged and put to a stop once and for all.
Their argument that individuals should dress modestly to avoid unwanted attention or potential harm is deeply flawed. We must bear in mind that attraction is a natural and normal human response.
It is also our responsibilities to control our own emotions and actions, rather than imposing unrealistic expectations on others.
I am not trying to be a champion for women, far from it. But frankly speaking, I think the onus should not be on the wearers but more on the “lookers.”
After all, individuals are not responsible for the actions or emotions of others.
This fixation on “sexy” attire, in the long run, will only divert our attention from more pressing issues that need our collective focus and energy.
Instead of spending endless hours dissecting and criticizing the clothing choices of individuals, we should be directing our efforts towards addressing the underlying problems that are affecting us all.
Why continue to blame the wearer when, ideally, we should be shifting our attention to discussing consent, promoting respect, creating a culture of equality and safety, and working towards creating a society where personal autonomy, self-expression, and individual choice are celebrated rather than scrutinized.
We must recognise the inherent contradiction in the argument that “sexy” attire invites unwanted attention or harassment.
Frankly, this perception is kind of dangerous and toxic as it implies that those who dress in certain ways are responsible for the actions and emotions of others.
If allowed to continue, such a mentality and perception could pose the danger of shifting the burden from the wrongdoer to the victim, perpetuating victim-blaming and undermining the concept of personal autonomy.
Why the need to police what others wear, when we should be focusing our efforts on cultivating a society that encourages individual expression, self-confidence, and respect for personal boundaries?
Realistically, promoting consent education, empathy, and healthy relationships is far more productive in addressing the issues at hand.
It is through education and open dialogue that we can bring about lasting change and create a safer and more inclusive environment for all.
It is also worth noting that individuals who choose to wear clothing that some may consider “sexy” or “revealing” are not necessarily seeking attention or validation.
Their choice of clothing should not automatically be equated with promiscuity or a desire for unwanted advances.
Clothing is directly or indirectly a form of self-expression, and everyone should have the freedom to wear what makes them feel confident and comfortable.
Of course, there are certain contexts where dress codes are necessary and appropriate, especially in professional settings such as government offices, formal events, or workplaces.
In these places, it is reasonable to expect individuals to adhere to a certain standard of attire that aligns with the expectations and professionalism of the environment.
Dress codes in such settings serve a specific purpose, such as maintaining a level of professionalism, safety, or conformity to a specific role or identity.
These guidelines are usually established to ensure that the focus remains on the work or the purpose of the gathering, rather than on individual appearances.
However, even in these contexts where dress codes are necessary, it is essential to approach them with fairness and inclusivity.
They should be communicated, consistently enforced, and designed to accommodate a diverse range of cultural, religious, and personal preferences.
Outside of these specific contexts, where dress codes are necessary, it is vital to respect the autonomy of individuals in choosing their attire.
The excessive scrutiny of attire, to a large extent, will only perpetuate a culture of body shaming and reinforce unrealistic beauty standards.
It will also create an unhealthy trend where individuals, especially women, are constantly judged based on their appearance rather than their abilities, talents, or characters.
This, in turn, will limit our collective progress and hinder the cultivation of a more inclusive and accepting society.
By fixating on clothing, we fail to address the root causes of such behaviour. It is not the attire that is at fault, but the attitudes and actions of those who engage in harassment or objectification.
It is unfair and unjust to make assumptions or pass judgments based solely on appearance. Each person must have the freedom to dress according to their sense of style, comfort, and personal expression.
This applies to casual settings, social events, and everyday life. Every individual, irrespective of age and gender, has the right to express themselves through their choice of clothing, free from judgment or condemnation.
So, to all the “lookers” out there, please mind your wandering eyes. Do not let them go astray! If you are not looking, everything will be just fine.
DISCLAIMER:
The views expressed here are those of the writer and do not necessarily represent the views of the New Sarawak Tribune.
